How Parents Make a Child of Divorce Feel
September 26, 2013
How Parents Make a Child of Divorce Feel


Dr. Laura,

I love your show! I wrote the letter below because I have been supervising visitation for a family that is in turmoil over a custody battle. I am from a family of divorce so I know how bad things can be. Your show touches so many lives that I wanted to share my words in hope in might make a difference in the life of a child.

Thank you,



Dear Mom and Dad,

I can’t talk to you about this, so I decided to write a letter to you both. In case you both have forgotten, I’m a little kid. I should not have to worry about grown up stuff now, because I know that when I’m big, I will be doing that all the time.

You both have decided not to be married anymore that was your decision, NOT MINE. Since I now have two homes my life is worse than when you both lived together. I thought that once you were apart the fighting would just stop but it has gotten worse. You have always taught me that God wanted me to forgive and love one another and I don’t understand why you can’t. I guess that is just a rule for little kids and not grownups.

Mom and Dad, I need you both to know that when you talk bad about each other to me it hurts my heart. When God created me, he made me half of each of you. When you criticize each other, realize you are also criticizing me.

The hardest thing for me is going for visits. When I get back from Mom or Dad’s house you both start asking me questions. You each want to find fault with the visits. If I act like I had a great time, you make me feel guilty, like I did something wrong.

You might not realize, but I can sense when you are unhappy or mad. Sometimes I even feel that you get mad at me when I show affection or love to my other parent. I want to love you both with all my heart. In church we talked about the 2 ladies who were fighting over a baby. They went to a judge to decide who was going to get to keep the baby. The judge said cut the child in half and they would each get a part. The real mommy said “NO” let the other lady have the child. The good lady did not want the baby to die and would rather give it to the mean lady. The good lady was the baby’s mommy. I was thinking about that story and wondered what you would do. You both make me feel like I’m in the middle with you both having a hold of my arms and pulling me apart. Mom and Dad are you going to cut me in two? I promise my hearts big enough for both of you. I love you both the same and always will. Please, Please, Please don’t make me choose between you. Don’t cut me in half because then I can’t grow into a whole person. I will always have something missing if I can’t love you both. You have always taught me to forgive and do what God wants me to do. I’m asking you today, forgive each other and let me be a kid that does not have to worry all the time.

I love you both,

Your Son or Daughter

Posted by Staff at 11:10 AM