One of the biggest reasons people struggle with rejection is they grew up in a family that ignored, discouraged, or discounted their emotions:
“You’re not smart.”
“You’re not interesting.”
“You’re not accomplished.”
“You’re not confident.”
“You’re not fun.”
“You’re not likable.”
“You’re not lovable.”
“You’re not good.”
“You’re not beautiful.”
“You’re not fit.”
“You’re not disciplined.”
“You’re not (fill in the blank).”
When you are built insecure, you expect to be abandoned or rejected.
However, rejection is a part of life. It’s ugly, painful, frightening, and disappointing, but we can’t avoid it. We can only re-frame it.
Think about it this way: all rejection means is that you tried something. A lot of times people will reject you for reasons that don’t necessarily have anything to do with you.
For example, I remember when I first started in radio 40 years ago as a co-host on somebody else’s show once a week. The first day, a woman called in and completely lambasted me. I was devastated and humiliated.
However, nine months later, almost to the day, the same woman called back and apologized to me on air. She said, “I’ve been listening to you, and you do have something to say. I apologize for what I did.”
So remember, rejection doesn’t mean your life is over.