September 11, 2012Saving My Marriage
Dear Dr. Laura,
It has been a pleasure listening to you on SiriusXM for nearly 3 years. I have learned so much. You are my surrogate mother and without you, I don't believe I'd be married today.
Like so many of the women my age (I'm 42) I was raised by a feminist mother who basically crushed my father's spirit and ran around like a chicken with her head cut off because she was stretched so thin.
I can't believe that today, just over 50 years and 1 month later, my parents are still together. Through the good, the bad, and the very ugly, they still love each other. Oddly enough, I didn't think they'd make it. When I was 15 years old, my father "retired." At least that's what Mom called it. Then the fighting ensued. My brother married that year and I was all alone.
I didn't find out until I was 33-years-old that my father didn't "retire"; rather he was fired -- fired from a long string of car dealership service management positions. He apparently had a terrible temper not just at home. I couldn't believe I didn't find this out. But, I guess at 15, you aren't really concerned with your parents' issues, other than those that affect you - such as constant arguing - hence, I found other places to be, other things to do, and not good things, either.
Today, I have a wonderful husband of nearly 16 years and two great, bright, beautiful, and happy kids. We live in a nice small town and have 5 acres of land. Eleven years ago, when we moved here, I was miserable as we were 2 hours from my hometown.
My husband and I sacrificed, working opposite shifts, so we could be home with our children. This strained our marriage tremendously, even with my part-time (24 hour/week) job. Thanks to your tremendous advice, I now look at things so differently than I did before. I know what is important, what my priorities should be, what matters, who doesn't, and most importantly, I finally know how to treat the love of my life.
You are a tremendous blessing. Were it not for you, this small family in rural Wisconsin would cease to exist. I hope more women find you and follow your wisdom, or rather, heed the warnings of those you speak to and help. I've learned so much and thank them as well for sharing their sorrows and losses.
All my respect,
Posted by Staff at 2:00 PM