Confidence is believing that you have something of value to offer. Sadly, many of you come from really crappy families and don’t have that sense. The good news is, confidence is like a muscle - the more you use it, the stronger it gets.  

Here are five tips to develop your confidence:

1. Make someone else feel better. There’s really nothing that makes you feel better than helping somebody else. When you feel useful, wanted, and needed, you build confidence and self-worth.

2. Come up with a list of all the things you’ve already accomplished. When you’re feeling negative and doubt that you can handle a certain situation, think about all the things you have already overcome.

3. Change your focus. Everybody has certain things they don’t like (or even hate) about themselves. Maybe you can remedy them, but if you can’t, you can still focus on the good things about yourself.

4. Do something that scares you. Most of how you feel about yourself doesn’t come from what other people say - it comes from what you do. Having someone pat you on the head and tell you how wonderful you are is nice, but ultimately, you are your harshest critic. You have to prove it to yourself. Set some goals and try new things.  

5. Live up to your own expectations, not anyone else’s. Just because someone expects you to do something doesn’t mean it’s your dream. My dad thought psychology was the stupidest thing in the universe, and yet here I am, a licensed marriage and family therapist. That was his opinion; it doesn’t make it fact.