My mom's been an alcoholic for 30 years and is 3 times divorced. My family has a history of women putting men down and divorcing them if they (the men) refuse to be abused or berated. When my husband and I married 5 years ago, I treated him the way I'd seen men treated by my mother. I was mean, dismissive, and a basket case. Two years later, I found out he was having an affair with a girl from his past. I immediately set about blaming him, trying to figure out why HE, the evil one, would do something so terrible to ME, the victim. No introspection for me, though.
Then I found you, and I heard you mention "
The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands." I bought it, read it, and I decided to give your methods a go and forced myself to be patient, as my husband was incredulous with the new me. It took a couple of weeks, but he softened. I changed, apologized and he did too. The bimbo was out; I was in. It sounds crazy, but for the first time, I realized men have feelings.
Now, we're far more in love than when we married. Mom's still a crazy alcoholic, but I keep her at arm's length to save my life and my marriage. Your book saved my marriage and you've taught me how to ditch my angry-alcoholic-mother's view of relationships and life in general. Thank you!
Emily