Woman's Version: How Men View Sex
April 24, 2012
Woman's Version: How Men View Sex

Dr. Laura,

I've been keeping up with your website but that's about it - as a homeschooling SAHM there's not a lot of radio listening going on! I've read a couple of your books and love getting my hands on each one. One comment, in particular, caught my attention :

"...this is the measure that men have of how much we love them whether we're willing to accept them (literally) into our bodies, whether we're willing to open up to them this is how men register that their woman loves them."

Yes, this was discussed by Carl but I wanted to add my opinion to it. I was never one to use sex as leverage or manipulation.  Promise; although I know a lot of women who do that. But I gave the occasional "no" when I was too tired or whatever. We never could wait that full 6 weeks doctors recommend after childbirth and illnesses didn't dampen our sex life like it "should" have but still, I was guilty of that little word.

After reading your book, "The Proper Care & Feeding of Husbands," I started to realize how true the view represented was for men. I wondered how to help my husband feel more loved. I told him when he came home from work that night I would never use that little word again when he asked for intimacy. It has been wonderful! That man is getting very spoiled, hahaha. And guess what I found out? HE CAN'T GET ENOUGH OF ME! It's amazing to realize he wants me that often - he's trying to show his love for me in that same way. How great to be so loved and irresistible!

He also knows we won't go weeks (or even days) without intimacy so he has no problem waiting - a shower to actually shower, for instance. All the intimacy makes us more affectionate, too (I didn't realize that was possible!) and it's good for our girls to see (4 daughters: 6 & under) so they can witness how a healthy relationship should look (along with all the talking and listening, of course!).

I just want to say "thanks again" for all that you represent.


PS: Just so you know how odd this all is, the whole extended family on my side would scoff at your ideas - that's why I'm not even spoken to anymore: I'm a "silly SAHM who is submissive to my husband". It's nice to have the last laugh, isn't it?

Posted by Staff at 1:26 PM