I recently found out that my son fathered a child from a one-night stand and I have an 8-year-old granddaughter. I thought of the gossip and shock on everyone's face if they found out, but then I thought of your phrase "do the right thing." That's when I sent the mother of my grandchild an email introducing myself and stating that I would like to get to know them.
I didn't hear back for months, but then I did, and I've finally gotten to meet my precious grandchild. We hit it off, and now my days are filled with joy talking to her on the phone, sending small gifts, and learning about the little person that she is. I kept reminding myself that she is an innocent child and did not ask for this situation. It hurts that she will suffer from the actions of my son, who chose to have unprotected sex and created a human being with someone that he did not intend to marry.
I've heard you say that grandmothers can be important in a child's life, especially if that childhood has been chaotic. I remember my own memories with my grandmother - baking pies, working in the garden and doing fun "Grandma" stuff. I'm only 45 years old, but I hope that I can be that special grandmother to my new (to me) grandchild.
I have gone from being ashamed to being ecstatic about being a grandma. Thank you so much for helping me do the right thing for an innocent child.
Remember, all of you can send me "letters" too - by email! Just sign into (or sign up for) the Dr. Laura Family - it's free - and tell us of your experiences.