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Letters From Listeners

Children Bond


Dear Dr. Laura,

I am writing to tell you how moved.  I am by the letter from Matthew about how his wife has stayed at home in France to raise their children (Being a Stay-at-Home Mom in France).

I am a professional child caregiver. I have worked in preschools caring for both young children and infants. I would give anything to be a mom, and stay home with my children. Unfortunately, there's no husband or potential husband in my life.

It has saddened me to see the children I cared for at day care for most of the day. I do not judge the parents badly because I do not know their situations; it may be that professional child care is their only option. But I am still sad for the children's sakes.

Many of the coworkers I have worked alongside were cold and harsh towards the children. I have done my best to be the one person who provides warmth and love.  In most day cares or preschools, when a baby learns to walk, he or she is transferred to a different classroom. This is traumatic for the child who has bonded to the former professional caregiver, and now is again placed in the care of a stranger. This process of transfer to a different room and teacher takes place again and again and again as the child grows older. Each time it is a saddening and traumatic experience for the child as he or she is separated from the previous caregiver to whom he or she had bonded.

I love my work, caring for children. But many times it is a sad, sad job.


Tags: Family/Relationships - Children, Parenting, Social Issues, Stay-at-Home Moms, Values
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