Hi, Dr. Laura:
I am a stay-at-home mom of 4 children and absolutely adore my husband. He recently called me from work to say we were invited to a fancy cocktail party the next evening. I was beyond THRILLED to dress up in something other than my daily "mom" clothes and I really wanted to look fabulous for him, too! I immediately got a sitter for the kids and set out to find the perfect outfit....and I did! It was lovely, sexy, and EXPENSIVE. My husband works very hard and makes a great living for our family, but he is also very conservative and wise with his spending. The amount this outfit and accessories cost was probably outside his comfort zone, but I rationalized this purchase was for HIM and that I never spend money on myself like that. I made the purchase and went home.
When he came home that evening, I couldn't wait to show him my outfit. He smiled, kissed me and said all the right things: it was beautiful and I was going to look lovely! After we went to bed I just couldn't stop that nagging feeling I shouldn't have spent that much money. Although we could afford it, I still thought the best way to honor and love my husband was to take the outfit back and make a less expensive choice.
IT WASN'T EASY returning those clothes the next day, but I found a beautiful outfit I already had in my closet that worked perfectly. I didn't tell him I had returned the clothes and when he came home to get me for the party he asked why I wasn't wearing my new outfit? I simply said that I had changed my mind. He gave me a big squeeze and said I looked more beautiful than ever. All night at the party he couldn't keep his hands off me and I knew I had made the right choice. I made my man feel important, honored and loved. And that, ultimately, was more important to me than a new outfit...and you CAN'T put a price tag on that. I have learned in 17 years of marriage, these small decisions I make with HIS needs in mind make ALL the difference in us enjoying a happy and healthy marriage.
Much love to you and your efforts in strengthening marriages, families, and stay-at-home moms everywhere,