How to Preserve a Husband
Be careful of your selection.
Do not choose too young.
When selected, give your entire thought to preparation for domestic use.
Some wives insist on keeping them in a pickle, others are constantly getting them in hot water. This may make them sour, hard and bitter.
Even poor varieties can be made sweet, tender and good by garnishing them with patience, well sweetened with love and seasoned with kisses.
Wrap them in a mantle of charity.
Keep warm with a steady fire of devotion and serve with peaches and cream.
Thus prepared, they will keep for years.
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