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Letters From Listeners

Signs You Shouldn't Trust Someone

Hi Dr. Laura,

The biggest advice I wish I had taken from people is if a person has cheated before, particularly more than once, then don't trust them with your heart.

I fell in love with a man who cheated on his ex-wife, as well as, cheated on two other girlfriends he had. This was a man in his 50's!!!  Even though he cheated on other women, he swore he would never do that to me and very stupidly, I believed it would be different with me. WRONG! All the signs were there: not having his cell phone around me, not bringing me around his friends, and not having one picture anywhere of us at his home or at his office. Why? After a few years of dating him, I found out he was dating another woman. She had no idea of me and I had no idea of her. I then made the HUGE mistake of getting back together with him based on promises he was going to change and get counseling for his "issues".

Within another year, he started in with the phone hiding again and not bringing me around his friends. Sure enough, he had another woman who lived 2 hours away who he would go see every other weekend when I was told he was on "business trips".

I know some people DO feel remorse when they cheat, but if someone has cheated on more than relationship, it's a matter of time before they do it to the next one. Thank you for being a voice of reason even if people like me sometimes ignore your advice. No more ignoring your advice.





Tags: Adultery, Choose Wisely-Treat Kindly, Dating, Marriage
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