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So What DO I Do All Day?

Dr. Laura,

We had just moved to a new town and had gotten acquainted with a couple whom I thought we would befriend. We seemed to have things in common and to be like-minded. The man and his wife were our age and had two children one of whom was the same age as our daughter. They were preparing to go out of town and the wife was trying to get many things done so they could leave.

From casual conversations with the wife, I had discerned the husband did not agree with her staying home. The wife had worked full-time and dumped the older child in day care but was currently at home with the younger one. I offered to fix dinner for the family so the wife would have one less thing to do.

What a dinner it turned out to be! The couple arrived late and I could tell things were tense between them. We ate, the kids played, and all was going well, when the husband looked at me (a stay-at-home i.e. a real mother) and said, "So, what do you DO all day anyway?!" He then looked at my husband and said, "What does she DO all day?"

My normally talkative husband was silent. To ease the tension, I said to my hubby: "Careful how you answer that. Remember, you sleep with me!" We laughed, but I quickly wrapped up the conversation and sent our new found "friends" out the door.

After they left, I said to my husband, "Why didn't you answer when he said that?" To which he said, "I was so angry, I couldn't reply. I wanted to pick him up and throw him out the door!"

The next day, and for many days after, I kept a list of all I DO during the day. It is truly amazing! Since that day, I have encouraged other moms to make a list of what they do during their day. I've only had one mom make a list and then decide to dump her children in day care. She decided her day was not worthwhile. Now, she sits at a counter at a store that sells kitchen supplies. But, the other moms have been amazed at what they accomplish. The greatest of their accomplishments is this: each woman provides a loving, calm atmosphere for her husband and children. This, of course, is priceless!


Tags: Behavior, Marriage, Morals, Ethics, Values, Parenting, respect, SAHM stay at home mom, Values
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