I was in a rut. I was depressed and angry and distrustful of my husband. We decided to give me one month to relax from my mommy duties. The plan backfired big-time. I could feel my husband starting to resent me as he took on cooking, dishes and started taking our 2 year old to work twice a week while I did nothing. I wasted my 'me' time and accomplished nothing to be proud of.
We got into a fight about it all, ending with him calling me out on being a less than grateful wife. Oh, that made me so mad.
I was left with two choices: I could wallow in the pain of his accusation and sink into a deeper depression, or commit to being a Stay-At-Home-Mom/wife with my heart, mind, body and soul. I chose the latter. I admit it was more to show him.
I took over the bills again, reworked our cash and ended my overspending, I planned and cooked healthy and yummy meals, with a small dessert each night. The house was clean and I was dressed with a hint of makeup each night. I was being self-righteous but somewhere along the way I started enjoying it. I started mentioning stay-at-home-mom "perks" to my husband as a way to keep myself in the right mindset. Some of these included...
- I get to swim with our kids 6, 5 and 2 any day of the week.
- I get to plan my day in a way that lets me sit and read (something I love to do).
- I carry absolutely no stress in my heart about earning money.
- I get to dance to the 90's station with my two year old while vacuuming together.
- I decorate our home any way I please.
My husband has started to point things out as well: I don't have to rush anywhere. I have time to do everything I need. When I think of my kids growing up too soon, I can scoop them up and change the plans and get my “Mommy” fix.
My husband has started pointing out to our children all the ways I make their lives fun, safe and loving. Like sitting out at the waterpark to watch our stuff while they went with Daddy down the slides because the lockers were broken. Like making sure they are dressed clean and neat everyday and have all the art supplies any kid could ever want.
The truth is, Dr. Laura. I WAS an ungrateful wife. I am now a grateful wife. I am now appreciated by my husband. It's all because I finally realized the perks to being a stay-at-home mom. Who in their right mind would want to be anywhere but at home raising their precious babies? It is the absolute most fun, laid back and best way to spend time on the planet.
Thank you for being a voice of reason in my life.
Happy Mother's Day!