Dear Dr. Laura,
Because I have been my daughter's mom, I'm proud to say that now I am her best friend. She's a junior at one of our state's most prestigious colleges, and is independent, fun, a leader and overall brilliant. Okay, I could be biased, but seriously. she's pretty great. When I was pregnant, all of my teaching money went to paying off our debts so I could stay home with her. My husband and I rented a tiny house for $350 a month and I stayed home and adored her and savored every moment in the childhood that always goes by too fast. I did a lot of things right. However, one thing I wish I had done better is reflected in this blog. It isn't my blog, but one that was shared on a friend's Facebook page. I hope you will share it with your listeners. It is powerful. - Ashley
PS. My daughter, now age 20, loves your show! I told you she was brilliant!
Six Words You Should Say Today
Very rarely does one sentence have immediate impact on me.
Very rarely does one sentence change the way I interact with my family.
But this one did. It was not from Henry Thoreau or some renowned child psychologist. It was a comment from kids themselves. And if I’ve learned anything on this "Hands Free" journey, it is that children are the true experts when it comes to "grasping what really matters."
Here are the words that changed it all:
"… College athletes were asked what their parents said that made them feel great, that amplified their joy during and after a ballgame. Their overwhelming response: "I love to watch you play.'"
The life-changing sentence came at the beginning of an article entitled, "What Makes a Nightmare Sports Parent and What Makes a Great One" which described powerful insights gathered over three decades by Bruce E. Brown and Rob Miller of Proactive Coaching LLC. Although I finished reading the entire piece, my eyes went back and searched for that one particular sentence; the one that said, "I love to watch you play."
I read it exactly five times. And then I attempted to remember all past verbal interactions I had with my kids at the conclusion of their extracurricular activities.
Upon completion of a swim meet, a music recital, a school musical, or even a Sunday afternoon soccer game, had I ever said, "I like to watch you play"?
I could think of many occasions when I encouraged, guided, complimented, and provided suggestions for improvement. Did that make me a nightmare sports parent? No, but maybe sometimes I said more than was needed.
Read the entire blog here. http://www.handsfreemama.com/2012/04/16/six-words-you-should-say-today/