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Parenting
05/13/2010
IconLast week, I blogged bout how horrendous it is that child molesters are treated leniently by judges and by parole boards.' Many of you wonder why that is.' I don't wonder - it's because the liberal world view of those in those positions of power concludes that such perpetrators are ultimately not responsible for their behavior, because they have a disease .' Those with a disease are, of course, offered compassion.' Since they conclude that this can't be a choice or an impulse not resisted or pure evil, then it must be a disease.' Therefore, they believe that incarceration is useless and cruel and the real way to protect us is to put them in therapy (another liberal enclave).The Catholic Church never turned its child molesters over to the police.' They put them in spiritual rehab again and again and again.' It's the same mentality:' these people are not evil; they are not criminals.' They are sick and need comfort and direction.And what about the children who were raped, beaten and murdered?' Well, they say, the best way to insure that no more children are hurt is rehab therapy and spiritual guidance .That is all complete BS.' These people are evil.'There is an organization called NAMBLA - the North American Man/Boy Love Association - and they march in parades and have websites and meetings geared to promoting the "healthy reality" that kids are sexual and have a right to their sexuality, and the only reason it has been criminalized is that society is uptight.Molesters in various forms are quite open, as their world view is that they are healthy and we are not.Since it is not politically correct to judge any more, many folks in our society (and in positions of power) include child/adult sex as a normal variant of human sexuality (as they do sex with animals and consenting sex with extreme violence and/or near-death experiences).As we keep dumbing down our notions of right and wrong, you will see more and more of this stuff normalized in our society.Pretty soon we'll hear Nero on his violin. More >>

Tags: BullyingChildrenFamily/Relationships - ChildrenMorals, Ethics, ValuesParentingSocial Issues
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05/13/2010
IconPeople in San Diego are understandably enraged and confused:' a convicted sex offender (who, in the past, had beaten and raped young girls and got only five years in prison) was let out on parole...to rape and kill a young woman again .In another part of the country, Gary Becker, the fifty two year old former mayor of Racine, Wisconsin had faced up to more than twenty seven years in prison after pleading guilty to child enticement and attempted sexual assault of a child.' What did he get?' His sentence was three years in prison.The judge in the case, Stephen Simanek, said (brace yourself) that he had been prepared to sentence Becker to probation - PROBATION!! - but was alarmed to discover that Becker had purchased girls' underwear two weeks prior to sentencing.'So, instead of probation or 27 years, he got 3 years (with the potential to get out in 1 1/2 years for good behavior - probably because there are no girls to rape in prison).'In my opinion, any judge who gives less than the permitted maximum should lose the bench.In my opinion, any Board of Parole that lets a convicted sex offender out before their maximum time is served should lose their position.It's a rare thing - in fact, I have NEVER read of a case of rape/molestation/murder of a child done by someone who had no previous record, so letting them out under any circumstances automatically condemns one or more children to rape and/or death.' Great comment for a civilization to make, right? More >>

Tags: ChildrenFamily/Relationships - ChildrenMorals, Ethics, ValuesParentingSocial IssuesValues
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05/13/2010
IconThis is from Barry: Dear Dr. Laura: I was a participant in an unwanted, unnecessary divorce...because my wife wasn't 'happy.'' I have 3 minor children who, despite my tremendous efforts to the contrary...only get to see me 7-10 days a month.' I do everything I can to remain in their lives so I might display to them the importance and value of good character, good values/morals, and integrity.... For Valentine's Day, I wrote my 5 year old daughter a poem.' I'm not a poet by any means.' I'm your basic manly man.' These words simply came to me in the half-hour it took to write them down.' In it are references to many things we do as a family ....I thought you might like to read it: A Poem for Claire A poem for Claire is what I will try.'I hope it turns out - ya see, I'm only a guy.'There are jobs that I have-'One is being your Dad.'Out of all of the jobs'That one makes me most glad. We do things we like'And some we don't mind.'I'm pleased that you're nice'And so warm and so kind. I tell you I'm serious'But you know that I'm not'We're both very silly'And we smile a LOT! We sit out in back'And look at the clouds'You see shapes I don't see'You make me so proud. Walking to school'Is always so fun.'It's been so cold lately'We can't wait for the sun! You fiddle with your homework.'Maybe a snack instead?'But each night we read'Just before time for bed. I love when we play'You're so very special'We dance and we laugh'Now it's time to WRESTLE! We cuddle on the sofa'Watch TV at night.'But we don't watch a show'That might give you a fright. We make up games to play'Sometimes go for a hike.'But what you like most'Is riding your bike! You play Dan-Ball and Rock Band'And sometimes the Wii.'"Daddy, come look!'Come here! Come see!" I'm busy in the kitchen'Moving fast there to here.'You're the first and the loudest'During our dinnertime cheer. I miss you dearly'When we're far apart,'But I'll always remind you'I'm in your head and your heart. The message is clear'In this poem you hear.'Your Dad loves you greatly'And I will always be near. I want you to know'You're my best Valentine.'I will ALWAYS be yours'If you will be mine. I love you.'Dad You've made me a better man, Dr. Laura.' I thank you. More >>

Tags: Family/Relationships - ChildrenMorals, Ethics, ValuesParentingValues
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05/13/2010
IconFormer "Growing Pains" star Andrew Koenig killed himself, presumably with some chemical, and he did this in a park where he used to go to "chill" or "meditate." Apparently, he stopped taking his anti-depression medications, which then allowed him to sink into a very dark place. That means his decision to commit suicide was a considered one.He disappeared on February 14, Valentine's Day. I wondered about that when I heard that. Here he was, with no wife and family on Valentine's Day: alone, with a minor career (and he was also the son of a famous actor who was on the original "Star Trek" TV series). It seems he had also turned down a job offered by a friend, and when that friend was away, Andrew collected all the gifts his friend had given him over the years, and then made that last trip to the park.Of course, his parents are suffering deeply, but whatever emotions they're experiencing, guilt should not be one of them. The truth is that if a person is hell-bent on killing themselves, they will find a way.The most common cause of suicide is an underlying mental disorder, followed by alcoholism as the second cause, and drug abuse as the third most common cause. Financial difficulties or other undesirable situations can add stress too. Over 1 million people commit suicide every year, and it's the leading cause of death among teenagers and adults under 35.I've listed below all the warning signs, but people who don't clearly show these signs can kill themselves as well, and people who show most of these signs may not. There is no "cut and dry" signal, but there are indications which serve as a warning. When you're aware that someone is LIKELY to kill themselves, please call 911 and have that person taken to a psychiatric ward at your local hospital. Physicians have the legal option of a 3 day "hold" to discern whether or not that person is a threat to themselves or others. When that determination is made, the potentially suicidal individual may very likely be put in a "forced commitment" status for treatment. Even that doesn't insure that they will never commit suicide, so it is good to be alert and know how to respond.Here's an easy way to remember the warning signs of suicide (this is from the American Association of Suicidology): IS PATH WARM? I Ideation S Substance abuse P Purposelessness A Anxiety T Trapped H Hopelessness W Withdrawal A Anger R Recklessness M Mood changesIf you observe these, seek help as soon as possible by contacting a mental health professional or calling 1-800-273-8255 for a referral. You can find out more information at http://www.suicidology.org More >>

Tags: ChildrenMental HealthParentingSocial IssuesSuicideValues
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05/13/2010
IconRemember Columbine?' Two Nazi-loving narcissistic sociopaths murdered teachers and students in their school because it would put them in the spotlight of history.....forever.No one stepped forward to stop them.The police stayed outside the building.Horrendous mishandling caused many innocent lives to be lost.Fast forward 11 years.Another wacked-out gunman with a bolt-action hunting rifle came onto a Colorado middle school parking lot and starting shooting at students.' He had just wounded two students and seemed ready to massacre more when a tall, skinny teacher (6'5" former college basketball player who oversees the school's track team) decided that this massacre just wasn't going to happen.' He saw the bad guy who was about to reload the chamber and decided that was THE moment.' He ran and tackled the shooter, wrapped his arms and legs around him like a strait jacket from head to toe, and held him for police.' Another teacher came to help keep the creep on the ground.'The two wounded students were hospitalized; one was released and the other was listed in critical condition.The teacher's name?' DAVID BENKE.By the way, the system allowed the gunman to be walking among us.' The bad guy, Bruco Eastwood, has an arrest record in Colorado dating back to 1996 for menacing, assault, domestic violence and driving under the influence.' That's some arrest record - the newspaper account I read did not mention prison time where children would be safe from him.When interviewed, the father of the creep said: "There's nothing you can say about it.' What can you say?' Pretty dumb thing to do.' I feel bad for the people involved." Dumb??' When you're talking about attempting to murder children?As for Benke, he still wishes he could have done more: "It bugs me that he got another round off" before being taken down.I am all for a trained and armed faculty member or security person on the grounds of every school in America.' Self-defense is a primary right of every living creature.My respect goes to Mr. Benke.' I admire guts, grit, and the compassion to risk to protect the lives of others, especially children.The community should set up a trust account for him so that when he retires, he will be taken care of for the rest of his life.' That's a small thing for saving the lives of so many children, don't you think? More >>

Tags: AbuseEducationFamily/Relationships - ChildrenParentingSchoolViolence
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05/13/2010
IconI basically don't care about the musical chairs relationships of Hollywood types, but I thought the following story was indicative of our culture in general...and that is not a good thing.'This headline was important enough to show up in the Top 20 stories of Google News recently:' "Alex Rodriguez and Cameron Diaz Get Cozy in Miami."' The piece started out:' "Don't tell Madonna, but New York Yankees third baseman Alex Rodriguez was spotted getting cozy with Hollywood actress Cameron Diaz at a pre-Super Bowl party in Miami last weekend."' According to this inane report, she was tipsy, flirty, and began "grinding on 'A-Rod', who had just broken up with Kate Hudson.' Clearly, sports is not the only thing for which you need a score card!'Generally, women who have nothing going on in their lives become groupies, because attachment to a star (even in their imaginations, much less their beds) brings them a feeling of importance.' Madonna, Kate Hudson and Cameron Diaz are all successful in their own right, so "groupie-ness" is not the issue.' Then what is?' What makes women "give it up" so easily for a guy who is good-looking, successful and has lots of money?' I guess it's the looks and success, and the feeling that even more money is always good.'There is so little dignity left in Hollywood's elite, and many political marriages are also aflame with betrayals.' Our young girls grow up next to young boys who have both misguided values and expectations.' The boys realize that respect and courtship are irrelevant when it comes to getting sex and companionship; the girls think that explosive beginnings mean something deeper.'I had one female caller who was just amazed at my admonition not to have sex as a flirtation, rite of dating, way to get to know someone, or stress releaser.' She actually was surprised when I suggested to her (and her 21 year-old "reality") that scarcity brings value.' While that is an economic issue, it also works for interpersonal relationships.' If the act of sexual intercourse is to mean anything , it has to have a context of love and commitment, and that is a scarce resource.'People wonder why they're depressed, anxious, unhappy, unfulfilled, lost, or compulsive about hookups.' There is an inherent knowledge that meaning and purpose are everything to their psychological well-being, but they are surrounded by the likes of an A-Rod and Madonna world which tells them there isn't any, except for notoriety and sexual flamboyance.'It's sad, really, because there is more to morality than just being a "rule system of the constipated," which, unfortunately, is what too many people believe.' Morality is a means by which we make human beings rise above the rest of the animal kingdom with symbols and actions:' like marriage and commitment, for example. More >>

Tags: AttitudeChildrenHealthMarriageMortalityParentingPersonal ResponsibilityPurposeValues
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Tags: CharacterCharacter-Courage-ConscienceMarriageParentingSexSocial IssuesValues
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05/13/2010
IconIn Port St. Lucie, Florida recently, a six year old was handcuffed (actually, one handcuff was put over both hands - she was a little girl), and hauled off to a mental facility.' The parents were all hysterical and angry that their "little baby" was treated this way.The mother, who works in day care, said "There is absolutely nothing wrong with my child." Her father said that what happened to his daughter was "just wrong." The school contacted this little girl's parents several times about setting up a meeting to discuss her violent behavior in the classroom, but they never showed up.' Hmmmm.'Here's what happened on that particular day:'The kid had yet another tantrum in the classroom after the teacher simply asked her to do something, and the girl was taken to the principal's office.' The principal, 8 months pregnant, endured the kid yelling, throwing things, kicking the wall, throwing a calculator, electric pencil sharpener, telephone, container of writing utensils and everything else on the desk.' The kid then physically attacked the pregnant principal, who called the police.'In my opinion, the police and the principal did exactly the right thing.' Leave it up to the medical authorities to determine whether this girl is being extremely poorly parented or in need of mental health treatment.'There are those who cry over how little this girl is and wring their hands and say that there must have been some other way.' No, there wasn't.' The parents did not take responsibility, and their shame was delivered as arrogance as they sought sympathy (and probably a lawsuit).'The school is supposed to be a safe place.' This girl was, and is, a threat to other students, the faculty, and herself.' I stand behind the school, the teacher, and the principal.' I wish we could arrest the parents for negligence in letting their daughter's behavior get this far. More >>

Tags: AbusecancerEducationFamily/Relationships - ChildrenHealthParentingSchoolViolence
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05/13/2010
IconI've said it many times before:' I admire GRIT.' Smarts and abilities are not enough.' They need to be riveted to grit.'''''''''Grit got Seth Wescott a gold medal in the finals of the men's snowboard cross at the Vancouver Olympics, where many others would have slid into oblivion.''''''''He started out badly.' In his qualifier, he slipped and spun 360 degrees and ultimately ended up ranked 17th out of 32 athletes to start the heats - which meant that he wouldn't get a good lane choice.'''''''''Instead of moaning and complaining, or losing his motivation, he told himself:' "OK, I'm going to have to work damned hard for this."''''''''At the starting gate in the finals, he said something to himself like "You've got to go get this one."''''''''He was last from the start, BUT he managed to come home to Maine, as an Olympic gold medalist for the second time.''''''''He didn't think of anything but the moment and the moves - no looking back with dismay, no beating himself up, and no giving up.' THAT is my definition of an Olympic athlete!And, obviously, I'm writing this story because this is the way you should approach everything in life! More >>

Tags: bullyingCharacter, Courage, ConscienceCharacter-Courage-ConscienceParentingPersonal Responsibility
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Tags: BudgetCliff EnnicoFamily/Relationships - TeensMorals, Ethics, ValuesParentingStay-at-Home MomTeensWork from Home
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